Oven

A hectic week of kids, work, homework, gray, dreay days has left me here at Saturday. I need a break from homework, I want to roast a chicken. I took her out of the freezer yesterday, so today she is only slightly frozen. I rinse and massage her, pat her dry, pull out the weird shit inside. (This is a big deal to a once vegan), but I have done it often in the last couple of years . I season her , salt,pepper, garlic powder, olive oil and some butter rubbed up under the skin to make her tan and crispy. I squeeze a lemon inside and toss some garlic cloves in there as well. Beautiful, or she will be, if I can get my oven to warm up.
I turned the beast on at least an hour ago, I have kicked it, open and slammed the broiler door open to help ignite the flame, I have sweared at it , threatened it, and even pleaded a bit. "The monsters are growing hungry and restless", I whisper, "they want chicken". I turn the tea kettle back on , and finally I hear the gas ignite again. Time to get on line and fantasize about a shiney new oven, one who will have a constant temperature at all times, what ever temp. I ask for , without attitude or burning or undercooking....